The Green Monster

Recently a friend of mine was telling me about some problems they were having in their relationship.  In talking with several of my friends, both male and female, there seems to be a running theme in relationships this year…JEALOUSY.  Whether it is coming from just one partner or from both, the result is usually the same, fighting.  Now add alcohol to this already volatile situation and the brawl is on.  Fortunately no one has gotten physical but sometimes the emotional scars can last a lot longer than physical ones and can do much more damage to a relationship in the long run.

From my own experience I can tell you that when physical violence enters a relationship people are generally smart enough these days to get out of the relationship.  Their friends and family jump behind them, encouraging them to get away from the person and move on.  When it comes to emotional abuse, people tend to not share this with their family and friends and there is no physical evidence for the world to see.  People also tend to feel silly when they consider ending a relationship because their “feelings were hurt”. 

I am a firm believer that when a person is jealous, the other person in the relationship needs to take a good hard look at what is going on.  If the person on the receiving end of the jealousy knows they have done nothing wrong then I would advise to pay close attention to what the other person is doing.  They say that if someone is jealous (and there is truly no reason to be) then they themselves are probably the one doing something they shouldn’t be and that their jealousy stems from their own behavior, not yours.  This is not always the case but it warrants looking into.

If neither of you is doing anything you shouldn’t be this can be a hard obstacle to navigate.  When jealousy rears its ugly head in such a way that it is causing severe fighting some serious changes will need to be made in order for the relationship to survive.  In my experience though where there is smoke there is fire, so whether you are the jealous one or it is your significant other, take a good hard look at what is going on and make a conscience effort to fix it.  If you aren’t invested enough to fix it then get to moving on.

I’m Watching- Jo

New New

They say you should write what you know.  I know things that people will want to know and some things that people would never want told.  But this is my sounding board and I am going to write about whatever I damn well feel like.  So hold on kiddies.  You never know when my next blast is going to be about you. Check back soon.

I'm watching-Jo

Coffee and Converstions

It is 7am and I am enjoying some "me" time at my local Starbucks.  When I arrived at 6:15am it was quiet, with only one person here besides myself.  By 7 the place is bustling with consumers of blended coffees.  I myself came to try the new Blonde blend.  I drink my coffee black and yes the standard Starbucks blend is a little too strong for me.  The rain was lightly falling when I arrived and it was still dark.  Now the sun is starting to come up and every type of person you can imagine is filing in to get their morning jolt.  Construction workers line up next to Chanel dressed businesswomen, who line up next to old timers who still enjoy getting their news from a paper, who line up next to teenagers stopping in on their way to school.  It amazes me that in any other place these people would probably not even give the other person a second glance much less engage them in vibrant conversation the way it happens while they wait in line for their fix.

I come just for this reason, to watch.  It amazes me the camaraderie that comes with coffee.  It is like a glue that binds people from all aspects of life together for a short time.  There is no judgement, no snide looks, just conversations about what the day has in store for each of them.  The businesswomen who is rushing to a meeting, the teenagers who are worried about being late to school and the test they have in calculus, the old timers worrying about the state of the country.  All of these topics are tossed around and people seem genuinely interested in each other's days. 

The baristas are refreshing to watch too.  They know the regulars.  They know people's names, what they drink, how they take it and all kinds of tidbits about their customers' lives.  If you are not a regular, like me, they ask what brought you in, and seem sincerely interested in your answer.  They are at times ridiculously upbeat, I assume this is from consuming a little too much of what they sell, but it is nice to see someone who seems to enjoy their job and their customers.

If you are not a coffee shop patron I highly recommend trying it out, if only to watch the people. It is never a waste of time to observe your fellow man.